‘As featured in the Wellness Edited Magazine’
Why does having something to look forward to make such a difference to our mental health?
It’s because our brains are wired to thrive on anticipation. When we know something enjoyable is coming up, (for you that’s Christmas) our brain starts releasing dopamine – the chemical linked with motivation, pleasure, and energy. What’s fascinating is that dopamine fires just as strongly when we expect a reward as when we actually receive it. That means our Christmas dopamine hit doesn’t just happen on the day itself. It shows up every single time we think about the things we love about Christmas. So every time you see the lights twinkle on your tree, imagine the smell of gingerbread, or picture laughter around the table, your brain gives you a little spark of joy. This really matters because our brains are naturally wired with a negativity bias – we tend to notice what’s stressful, risky, or urgent more than what’s good. Anticipation helps balance that out if we choose to focus on the positive. That’s why putting your Christmas tree up early can feel so good. You’re creating a daily reminder and a prompt to anticipate happiness.
Is it true that sometimes the anticipation of an event can actually bring us more joy than the event itself?
Yes, there is good science behind this. Anticipation lights up the brain’s reward system in a powerful way. When we imagine a positive event, we tend to picture the best bits: the sunshine, the delicious food, the laughter with friends. Our minds don’t usually dwell on the realities of rain, tired kids, or those little frustrations that happen in real life. In fact, research shows that sometimes the anticipation phase gives us more happiness than the actual event, because our minds linger on the best parts of the things we are anticipating – the lights, the laughter, the smell of gingerbread – without the stress or reality of shopping in crowds or family squabbles! That’s why sometimes the “looking forward to it” phase can feel even better than the event itself. Take Christmas, for example. The lead-up often brings weeks or months of little dopamine boosts – every time you scroll through mulled wine or Santa photos, imagine how someone will react to your gift, or think about what you’ll cook. It can be idealised, and perfect. The day itself might still be wonderful, but it will also include the ordinary human stuff: feeling frazzled, kids bickering, or your great uncle having one too many and stirring up family drama. Even if the day itself turns out to be pretty average, the good news is you’ve milked all that joy along the way by anticipating it being different – and that’s always good for mental health.
How can it help with stress and resilience?
When you’re carrying work, kids, partners, house admin – all of it – life can sometimes feel like one long list of obligations. Having something to look forward to restores a sense of balance. It reminds your brain that life isn’t just about what has to be done, but that there are moments of joy, connection, and rest waiting for you too. It doesn’t have to be big things topping up your tank. It could be the thought of your favourite Netflix show and an hour to yourself, lining up a Saturday morning walk with a friend, or even planning your favourite takeaway on Friday night.
This is part of what psychologists call “savouring” – the capacity to pay attention to, appreciate, and deepen positive experiences, whether past, present, or future. Research shows that savouring can boost mood and buffer stress, making us more resilient. Savouring pulls you out of the rush of, “what’s next on the to-do list”, and lets you pause in the present moment. It’s a little spark of joy. You’re noticing, you’re imagining, and you’re allowing yourself to feel good. Those moments become little stepping stones across the week, giving you energy and helping you cope more easily with what’s ahead.
How can we all create more of that sense of anticipation in our lives? You don’t need a big trip or a major event to enjoy the power of anticipation. In fact, it’s often the little things that give us the biggest lift, because they’re woven into daily life. Some simple ways you can build anticipation are:
Plan small rituals. Friday night pizza, Saturday morning pancakes, or a weekly call with a friend. These become bright spots you can look forward to through the week.
Book in micro-treats. A haircut, a Pilates class, a walk with a friend, or even just the promise of an uninterrupted hour with a book. When it’s on the calendar, you get to enjoy the thought of it ahead of time.
Stack little pleasures. Pick a new series to start, plan a recipe you’re excited to cook, or line up your favourite podcast for tomorrow’s walk.
Stretch the build-up. If you’re into Christmas or birthdays, put the tree up early, wrap gifts in advance, or talk about your plans with family – milk more joy out of the anticipation.
Share it. Telling someone about what you’re looking forward to can actually heighten the anticipation – whether it’s dinner plans or an upcoming day trip.
Take time to remember. Create a highlights album. Look through your photos, favourite the best memories, savour them and anticipate adding more to the album.
The key is being intentional. Anticipation doesn’t have to be expensive or elaborate. It’s about remembering to look forward and training your brain to anticipate joy to help build mental wellbeing.
